5

shit, damn fucking heart.

He's not mine to begin with, why must u be jealous when he went out with other guy

I really hate this kind of feeling, this jealousy.

U lost him and no matter what been said, deep inside I know there is zero chance anymore

4

There's no helping that people change when they love someone.

I do.

I changed, I compromised....on things that I won't on others

When u said u hate it, I apologized even though it's not what I believe in.

But then, maybe there's no excuse to what I did.

When I saw that u were still online after u said goodnight to me, it could only mean one thing.....

3

I should.........nah, MUST stop make a fool of myself.
It has been a one-sided thing for quite a long time already, only me refused to accept it and kept viewing it the way I wanted it to be.

Months passed.
The 1st month I gave the benefit of doubt, out of shyness with a new one out of sudden.
Took the initiative every time just to prove that it's okay, that I am open to it.

But when it continued without any progress from the other, well....it may be time to evaluate the situation again.

Maybe all these while, it was done just out of courtesy, just to reciprocate because I have done it, not from own desire. How stupid I have look like if it is really that way. How desperate it must seem to me.

I'll stop. I'll wait. but the flame is dwindling off and sooner or later, it may go off forever.

2

oh heart, please make a decision

Are u ready to commit or not?

Do u really love him or not?

Stop sway here and there.

As much I want a relationship, I don't want to break someone's heart if I actually don't love him.

Stupid heart, I give u time till tomorrow only. If not, I'm gonna set him free

1

When I knew u no longer have feeling for me, my heart died.

Then it struck me, why I even feel that way?

Little did I realized, all these while, u matter more to me than anyone else.

Just like the cliche we all been repeating about, u won't know until u lose it

U said maybe the feeling has not gone yet, that it can be rekindle

but second chance won't be the same as the first one.

The two nights we ended with arguing

I slept with tears in my heart

I wanna cry it out but I can't

Hug turtle to sleep

put it close to my shoulder

imagining it was u