13

2 weeks has passed.

Telling myself it will be alright, that everything will eventually go away.

It helps me, to certain extent.

When the night came and the darkness engulfed me, sometimes I will break down and the memories flood back like it was all yesterday.

No no, I am not clinging to it. Trying to let it go but who can kill one's memory

After all, he is happy now, no longer the lonely boy he used to be.

His happiness, isn't that my wish when the candle was blown 3 months ago?

Wishing him best of luck for TOEFL test.

12

Slowly, I'm letting it go; not because I want to but because I have to. The longer I'm holding on to it, the pain will become more unbearable.

Putting on my fake smile mask to fool everyone because if i take it down.......

even though I wish we're back to normal, the reality ain't that way. for the better of me maybe or else I will never get over him.

11

I miss u.

I miss him.

I miss..............J

Don't know why I keep writing it down here. Not like it helps me to get over him but maybe just as a memory.

To remind me someday that I had once loved someone so much.

To make me remember that I too am capable of loving someone with all my heart.

There's nothing wrong with loving someone so much even though it is just one-sided. Not everything is fair in this world.

U could treat someone so well and he will still forget u but at the same time, u still just can't take your mind off him.

Sigh~

Time to talk to turtle again, tonight

10

We agreed to be friend again, without benefit. Just like how we used to be before we started be touchy touchy.

But we both know it is almost impossible. At that time, u treated me well because u had feeling for me, u had a crush on me. U didn't mind drive all the way here just for dinner with me or pick me up so that I can accompany u while u completed ur assignment.
From my side, even though I didn't have feeling yet towards u at that time, I still treated u as well as u did to me because I finally found someone that I felt like could become a good friend. I miss having one after I lost so many.

But now, u lost that feeling. So tell me, what do u see me as now? My guess is I become just another normal friend; neither close nor good. U started see me as a crush. When u got to fall back, the only available option was just normal friend.
Me...I see u as good friend from beginning til now. So whether the feeling goes away or not, it won't change anything.

After all, when someone who tried to squeeze between his busy schedule to update u on his well-being become someone who find u after he has settled his daily chores, doesn't that tell u everything already?

Just another friend...beggar cant be picky

9

I never expect there will come a day that I miss someone so much that I'm crying.

I miss u, J

8

Now I understand what it feels to love someone so deep that it hurts

7

I feel lonely.

A terrible feeling.

Ever since I knew u, I never felt this way till now.

Don't know how to put it down in word but I want u back.

Back the way we used to